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I Quit My Job, again

Updated: Feb 19, 2022

From Registered Nurse to delivery driver to unemployed.

Hey there! My name's Alana. I'm 26 years old, newly married, and yeah, unemployed lol!

I've decided to dive into this mysterious world of blogging. I'm going to be completely honest and admit that I (may) have no idea what I'm doing, but I'm just going to go with the flow and let God lead the way.

So yes, as you've read in the title: I quit my job again. I'm writing this blog, however, to inspire others - not to quit your job, but to do what's best for you and follow dreams that you want to see come to life!

STORY TIME: I graduated nursing school in December 2017 and landed my first job as a Registered Nurse in March 2018. I was already working at a hospital as a nurse assistant, so I decided to stay in the hospital setting for my first job because well, I had no idea where else I wanted to work at the time. For my first RN job, I worked on a Geriatric Behavioral Medicine unit; the idea of working Med-Surg terrified me. Don't get me wrong, I was VERY grateful that I was able to get a job right out of school with no issue, but it also became VERY apparent to me that this was not the job for me to stay at long term.

I was miserable there. I remember I began to pray and ask God for a sign and to "lead me to a job that I would love" because I just could NOT handle the stress of that job. I would come home and cry in the shower a lot. I was depressed and burnt out, and on top of that I was working 12-hour night shifts, so my body was already under a different kind of stress.

I used to battle with the question "Wow, did I make a mistake with nursing???" I used to believe that God called me into was I now wrong??? Questions and thoughts like these led me to try to explore other avenues and interests. I wasn't able to leave that job right away, so I began to pray continuously for strength to get me through this job for as long as I had to stay there.

While at work, I started to research tools, materials, and ingredients needed to craft skin care products - this was going to be my way out of nursing for sure (Or so I thought, LOL)!! I started buying products, making skin care, and before I knew it, I put my two-week notice in and bounced!!! Little did I know, it wouldn't work out the way I thought it would [insert laughing emoji].

I officially left my first nursing job in November of 2019 after staying for almost 2 years. I say officially because I had left before to try another nursing position, but I was back to the hospital very quickly. I thought God was leading me to quit my job to start my business, so that's what I did! I had no plan, but I had tons of faith and peace!

During that very brief time of self-employment: I built a website, created homemade skin care products, made a few sales to friends and family - but I also stressed myself out more than I needed to. I had this unrealistic vision that my business would take off in no time, but I was wrong. It wasn't long until I was back on the road to searching for a nursing job - Ol' reliable.

In February 2020 I got another nursing job but this time it was in a nursing home; I stayed there for about 10 months until certain events lead me to believe that it was just time for me to go. I took some time off from this job and created and published my first poetry book: Gentle Whispers. During this time, I was also going through a very weird, terrifying spiritual season (which I may talk about on this site at one point).

In February 2021, I started yet another nursing job at a staffing agency - this time I was going to different nursing homes and skilled facilities, pretty much making my own schedule. This was nice for a while, until it wasn't. I could pick where and when I wanted to work - but that's the problem, I didn't want to work! I wasn't being lazy - let me clarify - I know I had to pay bills and continue to 'adult' but nursing itself was burning me out and I was honestly getting sick of it - picking up a shift got harder and harder for me to do - and that's when I knew it was time to do some major reflecting.

The anxiety, stress, and emotional baggage of nursing just got to be too much for me to handle. I wanted a normal "job" - one where I could leave work at work and not have to come home stressing about what errors I made or what I forgot to chart. That's when I decided that I was going to permanently leave nursing! I completely switched careers and headed in a new direction - I became a delivery driver! I won't disclose the company for liability/legal reasons, but I'm sure you can guess which company ;).

While there, I actually enjoyed the first few months. I enjoyed the peaceful solitude while driving, and not having to be enclosed in a toxic work environment all shift long. I enjoyed the nice weather and different nature scenes, and I actually liked organizing the packages to make for more quicker deliveries. Unfortunately, one unfortunate event led to another, and I decided to leave this job as well.

So here we are, caught up to the present time and unemployed. Like before, I really have no plan B - But God has gotten me through every single tough season in life before so I'm trusting him to get me through again. I don't know where to go from here, all I know is I'm tired of going back to something I know is not for me. Life is too short to spend it working a job that makes you miserable. So be thankful for the position you have, but don't be afraid to jump ship and find what best suits you.

I know for me, I'm afraid of making wrong decisions and making mistakes. But seriously, I'm human so it's kind of programmed into my very being lol. I got to give myself the grace to make mistakes and failures - it's all a part of life and that's how we grow and learn and get stronger. Honestly, I don't have it all figured out and I don't know what's next in life - but I refused to spend another minute of it worrying! I'm writing this blog as a first of many (God-willing) on a site I want to use to inspire others. Maybe it will be successful, and maybe it won't. But at least one day I'll be able to look back and say, "wow, I actually did it". 'til next time :)!!

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